Games

Random: Check Out This “Cursed” Compilation Of Mario Characters Speaking In Full Sentences

Warioware Get It Together 1

When you think of Mario’s best quotes, there’s not much to pick from. “It’s-a-me” and “woohoo” are not the kind of things you get engraved on your gravestone. Same with Luigi, Toad, Peach, and the whole Mushroom Kingdom cohort — it’s all “wa-hoo” and “oh yeah”. Hardly Shakespearean stuff, but it gives the games character, and often their short lines are so iconic that they become memes in their own right, like Waluigi’s WAAAAAA.

But every now and again, Charles Martinet is forced to work hard for his money, speaking in full sentences in the pseudo-Italian accents of Mario, Luigi and friends — and kind Twitter archivist @Destructo_Dan has compiled many of the most egregious examples for us to enjoy.

It’s not surprising that Peach doesn’t talk much, because her voice is so soft and light that it would probably float right out of her throat if she got too chatty.

Wario, on the other hand, can’t seem to decide if he’s a mafioso-type Italian or a weird grungy cartoon version of Mario who can speak slightly more intelligibly:

The most cursed of all, of course, is Mario himself, partly because you can almost see Charles Martinet sitting in a voice recording booth for long, long periods of time, becoming slowly more unhinged as he tries to insert Italianisms into every single sentence:

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My personal favourite, though — if it counts as full sentences — is Mario dreaming in Super Mario Odyssey. He just lists off types of pasta. Because he’s Italian, obviously. Here’s a very good animated version by artist and animator Louie Zong:

What is it that makes these full sentences so strange? Is it that we’re used to silent video game protagonists, or is it just the sheer ludicrosity of Mario’s Italian accent?

Tell us what you-a-think inna da comments! Wahoo!!

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